Relationships

Age: 11+

Overview: Describe to students the difference between a tonic and toxic relationship or friendship. Get the students to list the characteristics of a good friendship versus a toxic friendship and discuss.

Time: 5-10 minutes

Resources: https://www.modernghana.com/lifestyle/6966/how-to-identify-tonic-and-toxic-relationships-part-1.html

Age: Any

Overview: Set the students a list of several conflict situations and get the students to discuss how they would respond in these scenarios

Time: 10-15 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: This is a communication formula which can be useful in dealing with conflict and confrontational situations. Use it as a guide and fit it to your own style of communicating. D-Describe the situation, focusing on the immediate situation, E-Express your feelings, S-Specify what you want, C-Consequences, indicating the positive payoff for yourself and those involved if you were to get what you want. Explain this to the students and then give them scenarios so that they can practise the model.

Time: 15-20 minutes

Resources: http://adstv.on.ca/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/DESC-Model.pdf

Age: Any

Overview: In small groups get the pupils to discuss different difficult friendship scenarios and what they would do.

Time: 10-15 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Social stories are individualised stories of social situations that the students may encounter and the correct way to deal with these situations. These give the pupils a guide of how to respond in specific social situations.

Time: 5 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: In pairs pupils discuss a time they were angry with someone and a time they were forgiven by someone. Offer background to forgiveness first, what is forgiveness. Class then discuss why we forgive and why harbouring resentment only hurts ourselves.

Time: 5-10 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Get pupils to write a forgiveness letter (can be private) but get pupils to reflect on how it felt.

Time: 5 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Brief visualisation exercise encouraging forgiveness. Close eyes and imagine themselves giving a gift to someone they like, saying something kind and imagine how both feel. Then ask to imagine giving a gift to someone they don’t like and saying something kind to them. After, imagine if they can do this for all unkind people and discuss how they are in control of spreading positive feelings to others.

Time: 5-10 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: In pairs A and B. A discuss a topic that excites them, B has to deliberately not listen and appear disinterested then repeat but interested (60 secs each)/ Discuss how it felt when ignored. Discuss positive listening and negative listening (what makes a good listener).

Time: 5-10 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Form small groups and hand each group a brown paper bag of sweets (10minutes to plan). See the link for rules.

Time: 20 minutes

Resources: Brown paper bag, sweets, https://www.mheducation.co.uk/media/wysiwyg/openup/positivepsychology/u6/Unit6_L34_Sweet_Trading.pdf

Age: Any

Overview: Write a thank you letter for something they are thankful for.

Time: 5 minutes

Resources: Pen and paper

Age: Any

Overview: List 3 positive qualities of a friend

Time: 5 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Add playfulness to difficult transitions. For example, give instructions to body parts instead of to the child: “Please tell your feet that they can’t walk in puddles today”. Attempt to include sensory stimuli to down-regulate for transitions that require quiet bodies and minds. Use all 5 senses if possible. Consider environmental stimulation.

Time: 5 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Ask a volunteer from the group to leave the room. Separate instructions are given to him/her and to the group, who stays in the room in order to prepare for the final scene. While the volunteer is outside, each individual in the group has to choose one emotion and must express this emotion only through nonverbal behavior (acting). Remind them of the different aspects of nonverbal communication. Meanwhile, the volunteer outside is given the task of coming up with several social situations familiar to teens such as: in class; during family dinner; on a date; at a birthday party; working on homework, etc. Finally, when the volunteer is back to the room, he sets the scene: You’re in class (for example). All members of the group act as if they are in the classroom, including expressing their chosen emotional state nonverbally. They can use their voice but only in the form of inarticulate sounds. The volunteer observes their behavior and tries to guess how they feel. If he is confused, he can put them in another social situation (or only for fun:). The game can be repeated several times with different volunteers.

Time: 10 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Bring in random items and work as a group to make tower etc.

Time: 10-15 minutes

Resources: Items bought from home

Age: Any

Overview: Have two people talk to each other and give one an instruction to not listen in a certain way (e.g. look at ear, check the time constantly, flip through the pages of a book, etc). Then ask how that made them feel and reverse the process.

Time: 5 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: 7+

Overview: Get the students to read the same sentence but put the focus on different words in the sentence and get them to discuss how it changes the meaning of the sentence (I DIDN’T say she stole my purse, I didn’t SAY she stole my purse, etc)

Time: 5 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Give socially isolated students a role or a responsibility

Time: N/A

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Model correct conflict resolution using role play, demonstrations, puppets, etc.

Time: 5 minutes

Resources: Puppets, etc.

Age: Any

Overview: Teach students to use “I” statements rather than “You” statements when conveying frustrations, emotions etc. (“I feel stressed and backed up” rather than “You are holding up the whole project”)

Time: N/A

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Give the pupils an idea of random acts of kindness that they can perform for friends, family, teachers etc. Assign them the task of performing several random acts of kindness that week.

Time: 5 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Get the students to write things down that they are grateful for and put them all together into their own gratitude jar.

Time: 5 minutes

Resources: Paper, pen, Jar

Age: Any

Overview: Help each child draw a simple tree with branches (or do this step yourself ahead of time). Let children press a finger to an ink pad and use their inked fingers to make marks in different spots on their trees for each person in their families they want to include. Write in the names of each person. Discuss questions like, “What does your family do to show you they love you and that you belong?” “How do you feel when you do something together with your family?”. For a classroom setting, create a poster representing your classroom circle. Have each child add a fingerprint in a circle. Help children write their names under their prints. Talk about how fingerprints are unique, just as children are, and that each child belongs in the circle of your class. Discuss questions like “What are things you like to do in class?” “What is a way you like to help our class?”.

Time: 10-30minutes

Resources: Paper, ink pad, crayons or markers

Age: Any

Overview: Have children sit in a circle. Ask each child to take off a shoe and put it in the centre of the circle. Choose a child to go to the centre and hold up a shoe. Help the child ask, “Who does this belong to?” The child who owns the shoe will say, “It’s mine,” or, “That shoe belongs to me.” Then ask the group, “Who does the shoe belong to?” Children can answer together, “The shoe belongs to (name the child).” The child in the centre returns the shoe to the child it belongs to. That child can put on the shoe and continue the game by going to the centre. Talk about belonging using the shoes as an example. Explain that things that belong to us are helpful and important to us. Tell children why they are important to you. As a family or class, you belong together because you like each other, you want to be together, and you help one another. Discuss how doing things together and helping one another can help us feel that we belong.

Time: 10-30 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age:

Overview: Gather items such as those in the following table…

Make a picture: scissors, markers, glue

Get dressed: shoes, pants, shirt

Write: pencil, marker, crayon

Eat: orange, slice of bread, carrot

Brush teeth: toothpaste, toothbrush, glass of water

You may use the actual item, a toy version, or pictures. Note: Gather items that belong together based on the purpose of the items, not on how they look.

Put two or three items from the same category on the table along with one item that doesn’t fit. Ask, “Which things belong together?” Or prompt students by asking, “Which of these help us to (name category)?” Ask questions like, “Why do these things belong together?” “What do these items help us do?” Explain that although we are all different in some ways, we can do things together, work together, and help each other.

Time: 20-30 minutes

Resources: Listed items

Age: Any

Overview: Firstly, ask all the participants to sit in a circle. The first person starts to tell a story (whatever he/she wants). After 3-5 sentences, say “stop” and randomly choose another participant to continue. This person now has to repeat the last sentence said and then continue making up the story. If he cannot correctly repeat the last sentence after five seconds, he is disqualified. The game continues with the same rules and the winner is the last person remaining after everybody else is disqualified. This is the competitive version of the game. However, you can make up your own version, without disqualifications or adding new elements that you find useful.

Time: 10-15 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Firstly, a list of social challenges is created, taking into consideration a teen’s age or social needs. Challenges can be written down/printed on separate cards. If given consent to take part in the challenge, a teen takes a random card and his task is to do what is required on the card in the next 24 hours or over several days, as you jointly arrange. Challenges can be practiced once a week or according to whatever schedule you agree upon.

Examples of social challenges: Give an honest compliment to someone. Learn two new things about somebody from your class. Share with a friend what’s been on your mind lately. Call customer service at your favorite store and ask for information about some product you like. Tell your best friend what you like about him/her. Ask a teacher (or a coach) for clarification of a task you didn’t understand completely.

Time: 5-10 minutes

Resources: Cards

Age: Any

Overview: In pairs, one of the pairs is blindfolded and must walk through an obstacle course only using the verbal instructions from the other member of the pairs.

Time: 5-10 minutes

Resources: Blindfold, cones

Age: Any

Overview: This game is a great activity for breaking down barriers. Kids are put in small groups, ideally with a mix of kids they aren’t already friends with. That group then must find seven (or whatever number you want) things that they all have in common.

Time: 5-10 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Each child is given a slip of construction paper. On their paper, they write what they think is the most important quality in a friend. Those slips then get taped together to form a chain, which can be hung in the classroom and referred to throughout the year.

Time: 5-10 minutes

Resources: Paper, pens, tape

Age: 9+

Overview: Make a list of situations to be photographed and put the pupils into groups. Give them the list and a digital camera and send them out to complete as many as they can in a given amount of time. If you have time and drivers, send them around town for things like “take a photo of a duck" or “get a photo of one of the group pumping gas for someone." If you need to keep it close to home, make the list things they can make themselves or find nearby. Get everyone together at the end, hook the cameras up to the computer, and let them talk and laugh about the photos and fun things that happened on the hunt. You can leave out the cameras and have them make or find things to share with the group, instead.

Time: 60+ minutes

Resources: Camera

Age: 9+

Overview: Wrap a small gift, like a box of chocolates. Then wrap it with many more layers, adding a smaller item in each layer, like a sucker or piece of chocolate, and a question or challenge. Have everyone sit in a circle and pass the parcel, each person taking a turn removing one layer, keeping the goody, and doing the challenge or question. You can make the challenges things like “sing the group a song" or “share your most embarrassing moment." The group gets to snack and learn more about each other. You can make the main gift a box of bulk candy bars so everyone gets one, or put a movie there to segue to the next activity. You can make multiple gifts and do smaller groups to make it go faster. Be as creative in the questions and challenges as you want to get the students talking.

Time: 15-60 minutes

Resources: Chocolate, sweets, wrapping paper, gift

Age: Any

Overview: If you have a group of five or more, have everyone stand in a circle, reach in the middle, and grab the hands of different people who are not standing beside them. Then, have them untangle themselves back into a circle without letting go, crawling over and under each other to do it. They have to communicate and work together to get it done -- and it gets lots of laughs. You can let them interact organically or have them each tell something about themselves before they move, such as “I'm (name) and I love to travel" or “I'm scared of spiders." You can even blindfold some of the group so they have to rely on each other for directions.

Time: 10 minutes

Resources: N/A

Age: Any

Overview: Especially for a group that doesn't really know each other, interviews can help break the ice and get the kids talking. If it's a good sized group, give everyone a piece of paper with the numbers 1-12 in the shape of a clock. For each number, the students meet a person in the group and visit with them for one minute for a brief conversation about themselves. Have them write the name and a few details about the person on their paper. After 60 seconds, call switch until they've done it 12 times and met different people each time. If it's a smaller group, you can set it up like a news panel with an “interviewer” and two or three people as the panel. The interviewer can ask questions about anything, such as “What is the best pet and why" or “What will you study in college" and each panel member can answer. Switch out people so everyone gets a turn and learns more about each other.

Time: 10-15 minutes

Resources: Pen and paper

Age range: Any

Overview: Check in: Point to faces on a poster or picture that shows your current feeling. Or, draw a picture of how you feel right now. Check-out: Point to faces on a poster or picture that shows your current feeling. The important aspect of this task is to see what has changed.

Resources: A poster of different face emotions. This can be made yourself.

Time: A few minutes

Age range: Any

Overview: Check-in: Roll or toss a ball around a circle and take turns telling others something new about you or something you did recently. Check-out: Roll or toss a ball around a circle and take turns telling others something you liked or disliked about the day.

Resources: Ball

Time: 10 -20 minutes a day.

Age range: Any

Overview: Check-in: Have each child say something good and not-so-good that happened recently. Check-out: Have each child tell others about something she did today have they are proud of.

Resources: N/A

Time: A few minutes a day.

Age range: Any

Overview: Record 5 things from the past week that you are grateful for. Keep the entries a brief sentence. The point of this is to pay attention to the little things in life we would normally take for granted.

Resources: Notebook.

Time: Take some time in the week to come up with your entries.

Age range: Any

Overview: Cooperative learning is more than just pupils working together on a project. It requires structure interdependence. Activities can include getting the students to interview each other and reporting what they learn or solving a multi-step math problem together. Or a fun game can be to get pupils to form a circle, holding hands, while you drop a balloon in the center of the circle. The pupils have to cooperate with each other and keep the balloon from touching the ground by bopping it with their bodies but are not allowed to let go of each other’s hands. You can find a lot more examples of games and activities online.

Resources: Depending on the activity.

Time: Depending on the activity.

Age range: All ages

Overview: Ask your pupils to draw random names out of a hat, of the pupils in the class. Their task is to keep who they picked a secret, and to do random acts of kindness throughout the week. A nice activity would be to do a session discussing what kind of acts of kindness they could use.

Resources: N/A

Time: Approx. 10 mins to assign pupils. This can last as long as you’d like, e.g a week/month/term.

Age range: Any

Overview: Kagan Structures, created by Dr Kagan are strategies designed to promote cooperation and communication in the classroom. The activities boost students' confidence and engagement in the classroom.

Resources: Free articles and activities can be found at www.KaganOnline.com

Time: Depending on the activity.

Age range: Any

Overview: The ‘circle of friends’ approach works by mobilising the young person’s peers to provide support and engage in problem solving with the person in difficulty. A major advantage of the approach is that it does not involve a major commitment of time from teaching staff. This is because the true work is done by the peers themselves, not the adults. The adult’s role is to meet with the circle and the focus child for around 20-30 minutes weekly to facilitate their problem solving in the early stages. Successful circles will often become largely self- sustaining and provide support for the focus child without the need for regular adult input. When there is careful planning and real commitment form the facilitator, results from the process are seen very quickly. For more information visit the website https://inclusive-solutions.com.

Resources: Resources and training on website

Time: 20-30 minutes weekly check ins.

Age range: Any

Overview: Social Stories are a social learning tool that supports the safe and meaningful exchange of information between parents, professionals, and people with autism of all ages. Social stories present information in a literal, 'concrete' way, which may improve a person's understanding of a previously difficult or ambiguous situation or activity. The presentation and content can be adapted to meet different people's needs. Social stories can be used to develop self-care skills, as a behaviour strategy or help someone understand how to respond to a situation etc. For more information and to find out how to write a social story visit this website https://www.autism.org.uk/about/strategies/social-stories-comic-strips.aspx

Resources: Paper and stationary to create your social story.

Time: They are usually short stories. So 10-20 minutes to create a story.

Age range: Any

Overview: This game is similar to Chinese Whispers but using gestures instead.

Resources: N/A

Time: Around 10 minutes, depending on the size of the group.

Age range: Any

Overview: Value of the Week is an online program that explores a different virtue each week. It helps students to understand their individual character strengths by exploring the benefits of developing a growth mind-set. Value of the Week helps develop coping mechanisms that they can use to cope with everyday challenges.

Resources: This is an online resource. For a monthly subscription you can join online at https://valueoftheweek.com/

Time: See online for more details.

Age range: Any

Overview: On the ELSA support website there are plenty of resources for free download and to purchase. You can choose resources by category such as friendship skills. Examples of some great resources are: Friendship Bingo, What are they thinking, Kindness Lapbook, Blob trees and many more!

Resources: Find these resources online at www.elsa-support.co.uk

Time: Depending on resource activity

Age range: Any

Overview: A card game that helps develop communication skills.

Resources: Can be bought online at https://familylinks.org.uk/shop/ask-it-tell-it-game

Time: Around 15-30 minutes

Age range: Any

Overview: Fink provides lots of conversation cards on different topics, specifically developed to support children and families in matters of health and education.

Resources: Purchase your cards at http://finkcards.co.uk

Time: 5-10 minutes

Age range: Primary ages 5-11

Overview: This is a simple class game to teach good interaction. You can start by introducing the children to the feelings that we get from when someone does something nice and call it 'warm fuzzies' and the opposite feelings for 'cold pricklies'. Explaining that when they get a warm fuzzy given to them you want to give one back (i.e. a smile) and this also goes for cold pricklies (i.e. how a fight starts). Read out words that pupils may say to each other and pupils judge whether it makes them feel warm and fuzzy or cold and prickly. You can also so this for actions.

Resources: N/A

Time: 10-30 minutes

Age range: Any

Overview: This a single page of writing that captures the important information about a person; including what is important to them, what people appreciate about them, and how they want to be supported. Everyone can benefit from having a one-page profile.

Resources: Paper and stationary/ Computers

Time: 20-40 minutes to complete a one page profile.

Age range: Any

Overview: A great way to improve emotional literacy and emotional understanding of others. Start your activity by showing new pictures of animals with different facial expressions and postures. Ask pupils to discuss and decide what emotion that animal is presenting.

Resources: Animal picture cards

Time: 5-10 minutes

Age range: Any

Overview: Another useful icebreaker. Describe to the pupils a social situation and role placy an appropriate posture.

Resources: N/A

Time: 10-20 minutes

Age range: Any

Overview: Decide on a personal greeting for each child to greet them as they come into class. A great method of building a relationship with them.

Resources: N/A

Time: 5-10 minutes

Age range: Any

Overview: An ice breaker or class game. Challenge the pupils to go as long as they can communicating with each other without using words. Only use facial expressions and gestures etc.

Resources: N/A

Time: As long as you make it